5 Ways My Dad Made Me Hate God and Church.

My dad passed away a forgiven man, restored and reconciled by the blood of Christ. God worked mightily in his life and restored him in his faith and my parents in their relationship at the end of his life.  Yes He even restored dad and me in our relationship.  My dad was a great example to us boys when we were younger.  No, he was not a good example of how to be a Christian husband or how to be a godly father.  But he was a great example of how to make your kids hate God and hate Church.

*yes you read that right*

The fact of the matter is that the consequences of my dad’s sins when he was the “daddy” to three young boys still lives out today.

I am the only one of his 3 boys who “goes to church.”  And if the truth be known – which it is if you read my blog, I was not always a “good Christian.” As well, I have personally struggled with how to be a good husband and father, in part because I did not having an earthly father worthy of emulating.  Sadly I did emulate many of his negative characteristics, and still do on occasion…  It has been a hard journey of stumbling and praying, learning to be a godly husband and father, and I am nowhere near done. Yet with all that said I do have a heavenly father worth emulating.  And I am thankful that He kept me in His care.

If you were raised in a stable home, with a godly father, you may not understand much of what I write about, but these issues certainly exist, and are so much more prevalent than you think, even in our churches.  Thank God that your father was a godly man, for he had an amazing influence over you.  On the other hand, those of us who had ungodly fathers must struggle and break the cycle of sin, relying solely on the grace and strength that Christ supplies.

I am sure my two brothers believe in God, that is, I am sure that they believe there is something bigger than they are…but why would they care to know their heavenly Father when their earthly father did nothing to emulate His love?  In fact he even showed hypocrisy as we were growing up… that is enough rambling.  I pray daily for my brothers, that God would open their eyes and bring them to repentance.

Please note. I am not trying to slander my father.  I want to present the major mistakes that he made, that a lot of fathers make (some that I made) in the hope that maybe just maybe, one father out there might read this and maybe change his ways before it is too late and only 33.3% of his kids go to church.

If you want your kids to hate God, His Church, and to see you as hypocrite then please do the following:

1. Do not speak to them about God, faith, sin, or Jesus.

That is what the Christian schools are for isn’t it?  I mean I pay them a fortune every year – they better be teaching my kids about that stuff. The only time I ever heard the name of Jesus in my home was when my mom would speak to me, or when my dad would say the occasional mealtime prayer.    I am so thankful that I had that time with my mom who taught me about the grace of God. In fact my mom is one of the godliest women I know (But it should not have been her job!)

2.      Do not teach them about personal devotions 

Only read the Bible with your kids at dinnertime.  That is enough.  No more is needed.  Less would be best.  Mom can read the Bible to them if she wants but your work is done.  If I am honest, my dad never even read the bible at dinner.  If you do read the bible, never explain what you read or ask questions either, but I would refrain from reading the Bible altogether, like my dad did.  The only times that we need to pray  at home is when we have dinner, other than that there is no point in praying. Praying is a private matter between them and God, right? At church or with other Christians you should only pray when called upon to pray.

3.      Have questionable morals

Tell off colour jokes, look at pornography, flirt with women, smoke, get drunk, use curse words frequently, speed in your car, swear at drivers who cut you off, listen to ungodly music full of swearing, blasphemy and sex, watch immoral TV programs and movies, never help your wife with household chores, even if you are off work … but make sure to get mad at the kids if they do any of these things …

4. Don’t make church attendance a priority.

Make sure you attend at least one service on Sunday so that people know that you do go. This is called paying lip service. Of course skipping at least one service is required, especially if you are tired or if the hockey game is on – Sundays are always matinee showings for sports you know. If you do go to a service, make sure you pick up MacDonald’s on the way home as a reward for the kids being good at church.  Also make sure that you do nothing above and beyond with regard to the communion of the saints, do not go to bible studies, do not participate in extracurricular church functions, like outreach or evangelism, and never volunteer to serve in the church, but if you do, make sure that the kids know you are just trying to please people or that it makes you feel good.  Try, often, to back out of any commitments you have made in the church.

5. Only show affection to mom in public.

When at home never kiss your wife in front of the kids. Ever. Never hug her in front of the kids.  Ever.  In fact you should probably speak down to her in front of the kids. This will show them that you are the head of the family. But at church, make sure you hold her hand or put your arm around her; play with her hair, act like she is the world to you, this is sure to confuse the kids.

Not all of you will have all of these weapons in your arsenal, but I am sure most of you have some.  If you want your kids to grow up and leave the church, or hate the church, or hate God, or hate you, simply just go through the motions… and it so easy! This list will just come natural.

**Just in case you read the list without the preface I have to say that I am not serious! **

For those of you who know what I am going through not having a fatherly role model, I thank you for your support.  For those of you who do these things….please turn to God. Repent. And move forward in the strength that he provides. Your family will thank you.

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. Proverbs 22:6